Virgo

   Ugh, procrastinating again, though I actually have so much to do during the holidays. No idea for any blog posts though. Nothing. Ah, then I stumble across a certain pretty girl's blog post, and I had *so much feels* I have to write something back!

*warning: love confession time! XD

 Yeah, if you are a guy. I would sing all the Taylor Swift songs you love, regardless of your gender (and boob size lol?). And I'll still be your faithful secretary, though I kinda suck at taking up responsibility, but I will still be. Fun fact, the day you called me 'the best secretary ever'...I was SUPER touched...for some reason it is a big deal to me. The round table will still be as noisy, or more noisy than ever. And if people think we're dating, we will probably laugh about it and say 'yeah, yeah we are.' And I would let you take me to prom. (btw I was all like someone wants to take me to prom aww yeah!! xp) When you are feeling down, I'll be there and cross my fingers that I can be helpful about it. And I'll always listen. I would dump all my personal stuff on you, and you will definitely make me feel better. Hey, things are always 1000000 times crazier, and more interesting when YOU are around ;)

Random note : Hmmh, if I am a guy, I would be...gay. that's about it? lol xp.

Long live the walls we crashed through

I had the time of my life 

with you

Have happy day everyone,

Lexie

 
   

2 Years

    They say you will revert back to you old ways when you meet your old friends again, and I guess I personally experienced this. It has been so so so so long since The Annoyings can get back together as the 'Lucky 7' again, since someone is always not around or busy. And what happens when seven 19 year olds who haven't reunited in two years meet? We act like we're 16 again of course. And tear the place down.  

   I thought I am crazy enough in Form 6, and honestly I am, but somehow this is a completely different kind of crazy. It is a 'I feel even younger than I've ever felt before' kind of crazy. We laughed at every sentence we said, talked about personal stuff so loudly I think the whole place knows us now, *made fun of our ex-es XD*, made a fool of ourselves while ordering food, refilled our drinks twice, took like literally (seriously, literally)a hundred pictures... and a lot of it was a result of hogging the waitress for like 15 minutes. And the list goes on. The songs they played at Burger Bar was really appropriate too. 'We Are Young' and 'Good Time' starts playing, and you feel like the night will never end.

   But as always, three hours passed by like 3 minutes. And I have come to the conclusion that it isn't a truly fun night if I don't end up feeling like vomiting by the end of it. Yeah if I laugh too much I get a 'condition', but oh well. We seldom talk about important life stuff whenever we are together, you know, stuff like how  studies are and what are our plans for the future seem to slip right off our minds. But for two of The Annoyings going to UMS, I wish them allll the best. And I know our paths will always cross, no matter where life takes us.

   When we are together, the night will never end.

Tonight we are young

So lets set the world on fire

we can burn brighter than the sun  

I'm in if you're down to get down tonight
Cuz it's always a good time

 

Like we dream impossible dreams

Life is daydreaming when you have more important things to do,
Getting upset over things that don't matter,
and laughing at things that don't make sense

Life is having a crush on strangers,
and falling for the wrong people,
Getting to know people you thought were your friends,
and getting closer to those you never thought you would

Life is falling asleep in class,
and going crazy in the school library
Dying to go home on a busy day
And dying to go back to school when you're lonely
It is trying to make sense of sarcastic remarks in PA,
barely staying awake while teacher is doing sums,
doing chemistry experiments without any results,
and singing your heart out in Bio.

Life is getting your jobs done at the last minute,
and freaking out together after a very hard test,
getting broke on birthdays,
and starting the surprises all over again
planning crazy things for the holidays,
and talking every moment like we are never meeting again.

Life is knowing that some things are wrong, but feeling that everything is right.

Right now, everything is right.

Look at you worrying so much about things you can't change
You'll spend your whole life singing the blues if you keep thinking that way

Don't you see the starlight, starlight

don't you dream impossible things

Eventually, Apparently

I'm writing this post... just because.

She's the kind of girl that, right off the bat, she knows everyone and everyone knows her. When she talks, there is no way you won't hear her. It might be easy to hear what she says out loud, but not everyone can  understand what she is trying to say inside. And I think she trusts me enough to tell me sometimes, and I hope I am worthy of this. She's open about what she says, but I realize that I do trust her with my secrets. She knows...things ;)

There is no end to the things she does that is...redundant but always entertaining. Teasing the Enlightened Forehead (and being one of the only people that can freak her out xp), giving people weird nicknames, singing songs about Mr. Naruto, making up her own songs, using words whether they are correct or not. Having 'on and off relationships' with Mr Ethanoate, even though I know perfectly well the two of you are good friends. (Seriously you two, get yo act together or I will really lock you two up in one of my empty rooms). Ah, how empty our classroom life would be without her XD. (I am not being sarcastic. really.)  

It is the feeling you get when someone gives you a gift, tells you 'I have been saving this for when I have a good friend, and now I am giving this to you'. It makes you wonder about how fast a friendship can develop. I have never seen it coming, since we weren't always close, nor do I understand what got it started, but hey, good things always happen that way. The best things always happen that way. Yeah, I tease her a lot, because that is how people naturally act around her. But the best moments are when she talks, REALLY talks, and I listen. Then I understand a little bit more, about her, and about myself too. Sometimes we are a little bit too alike inside.

So stop worrying about so many things. I know you're stressing out so much, and Mr. Idiotic isn't making it any easier (even though it is supposed to be his job). You're going to do fine, you have done so well. Considering that people ask 'why did you take this subject?', you are proving them wrong. And I think it's awesome.

   Thank you for showing me so much, for being an awesome friend and thank you for everything you do that did or did not annoy me. You know I will never actually be annoyed at you ;) Well here you are, your very own tribute post, something I knew I would write...eventually. Why did I write this? I don't know. I am writing this post...just because. ;)

We get high, we let go

We got more than we know

My friends are a different breed

My friends are everything

 Have a happy day everyone, 

Lexie

 

Merge

And there you go again telling yourself it is okay

Once again you are doing what they are used to seeing

There you go again 

Causing a scene like they are not tired of hearing about it

Thank you for those always willing to listen

Sorry that in the process, she cried today

But thank you for helping me get through this

I guess no matter how annoying I get 

I am never alone

也许是我自己没看见

她说，

他本来就是这样的

我从来都不曾怀疑

然后她说

那短短几句话

我‘不该知道’的话

那么可笑

原来我连朋友也不值

Whether or not I offend people

I never mean to 

Not always

Especially not you

Whether or not I should get offended

it is an endless cycle

and guess what,

at the end of the day

it wasn't anything to worry about anyway

不知要怎么形容

当朋友被伤害了

与自己受伤了

差别好大

结果只是

坐在那儿 闷不做声

像一个懦夫

不敢直视你

不敢责问你

就这样

坐在那儿

我还能做些什么

还不够吗

如果我做不到你想要的

那一切一切都是我的错

你以为我的性格就是这样

什么心事都告诉别人

生气也说

伤心也说

我多么地坦白

我多么地开放

我对全部人都是这样？

你很佩服我的爽朗吗？

And I finally decided to go for it

no matter how insecure I get

but I think they're right

you never know till you try 

even if you know how it ends

even if you know how it always ends

I trust you

I do

即使你感谢我对你的信任

即使我永远也不告诉你

你是有多么的伤人

你知道吗

对不起

从今 ， 以后， 

我无法再相信你了

朋友

什么是朋友

and those words rang in my head

she said,

'it's not worth it',

and so I tell myself,

but the words seem so clear -

you are not worth it

you are not worth

you are not.

You Are. 

when I woke up I had everything

a handful of moments I wish I could change

And a tongue like a nightmare that cuts like a blade

Arrogant girl

Love yourself so no one has to

they're better off without you

Arrogant girl

cause a scene like you're supposed to

they'll fall asleep without you

Give me therapy 

I'm a walking travesty

But I'm smiling at everything

Therapy 

You were never a friend to me

you can choke on your misery  

4 a.m

I have never really 'gone crazy over the weekend', but I think I can tick that box off now. I had the most surreal weekend ever, the type that made me think we are done with exams/ graduating, when in fact our first test of the semester is coming up in two weeks. I think that for some what  we did over the weekend was pretty normal, but I had this surreal feeling that I was hallucinating, and all that was just a dream. If it was, it was a great dream :).

I visited three houses I never thought I would in a span of two days, got to drink Mr. Marlboro's famous coffee, sang until my voice completely went (thank god it is almost back to normal now), watched a super stress-relieving movie, ate at a place I never thought I would, talked through the night and slept in the morning. If there was ever a time to feel like Taylor Swift's 22, that was the night.

It feels like one of those nights,

we ditch the whole scene, and end up dreaming, instead of sleeping.

We're happy, free, confused, and lonely in the best way

it's miserable and magical

Mr. Tsubasa has finally left. Of course, it feels like he came back for only one day, but I would take even a few minutes than none. I've never properly thanked you for the book, but I really really appreciate it, especially the fact that you got it, even after I told you ten times I don't need anything. But it would take awhile before I finish it, since there are tons of books lined up to be finished *guilty*. we didn't have a really, really proper farewell, since I had to rush off so suddenly,but no farewell can ever be *perfect*. And this isn't goodbye, it's just 'see you again'. I hope you take care, and I hope Australia is good for you. Continue getting those awesome results, and don't worry, you deserve every bit of it :)

This is when the feeling sinks in,

I don't want to miss you like this

come back, be here,

come back

be here

I don't know why but sometimes when I get too lost in the moment, I kinda start getting emotional and confused about some things. Like some things are such a bad, bad idea but in the moment, you feel like it is the best thing ever. Then when the moment has passed, you're all like 'yeah, if the things I do can just stop being a bad idea, that would be great '
Oh well, I guess I can't emphasize this enough, but...
what an awesome weekend :)

I don't know how it gets better than this

You take my hand and drag me head first,

fearless     

    

Let's Talk Greek

Given how the situation is currently I am surprised I didn't post something like this earlier.
Greek mythology. Everyone loves it,  some more than others, some used to know more and not so much now (raises hand *guiltily* ).

I am not going to go on and on and on about every Greek hero I know, but what I WILL do is, I will talk about my top three favorite characters.

Number three - Eros.
Well, of course the Greek version of Cupid has to be in the list. Who doesn't like cupid right. Greek god of love, sometimes depicted as primordial, sometimes as the son of Aphrodite, I actually find this a bit confusing ...but since when are Greek myths not confusing right. I don't really think my particular fascination is with Eros himself though, probably more towards the whole Erotes thing. I've seen them described as 'part of Aphrodite's retinue. Erotes is the plural of Eros, who as a singular deity has a more complex mythology." Okay you see I find that confusing too. So there are three gods involved in the whole 'love' mechanism, Anteros - the god of recruited love, Himeros - god of unrequited love, and Pothos - god of longing/desire (especially for those who are absent). It is kinda interesting to think that there is a god for each of these love- related feelings. But I would say that if they do exist (hey I am not saying they don't xp) I know which one I would be giving the death glare to for frequently visiting me (yes I am looking at you Himeros =.=).

Number Two - Apollo
My favorite Greek god ever. I have no solid reason as to why he is my favorite Greek god ever, but it probably has something to do with the fact he seems to be the only Greek god that I would imagine to be...young and handsome. Something like that. Lets see, Apollo - god of light and the sun, truth and prophecy, healing, plague, music, poetry, and more... Yeah. there is more, like it wasn't enough. Honestly the only stories I really know of him are the ones involving his lovers, I know, I know, you can see what my preferences are. Particularly the one about Hyacinthus (if it involves a male lover there is no way I wouldn't be all over that). But it is sad that there aren't much information on Hyacinthus, besides the fact he was handsome, athletic, spartan, and accidentally killed by Apollo himself while throwing the discus. Of course I prefer the version where Zephyrus blew the discus in Hyacinthus's way because he was jealous that Hyacinthus chose Apollo over him. Yeah, love can be dangerous sometimes.  And in the end, of course, Apollo turns him into a flower, which is apparently probably maybe the Iris (instead of the Hyacinth which I think it should logically be =.=).

Number One - The reason I was into Greek stuff and also the reason for this post anyway,

Narcissus. There is no stopping me when I start on Narcissus, but I would try to not write a novel on him.
Yeah maybe he was the most beautiful boy ever, guys and girls were falling for him left and right just by looking at his face, but I can say that I didn't even need to look at his face and I am already in love with this guy. His story is popularly known as something related to vanity, there is even a word to describe someone who is vain after his name. But I'm sure people who read into it felt like there was definitely more to it, like this story wasn't created just to talk about a vain person and his certain death, adn the moral of the story sin't just 'don't be a vain jerk'. Not to mention that his story was also related to how the nymph Echo became the 'echo' we know of now. And there were so many characters, Tiresias started it all by making the prophecy that Narcissus would live a long life if he did not know himself. Now I think that is where the trouble begins, because if his parents didn't frantically try to make him NEVER know how he looks like, and if he had known how he looks like since young, I do not think he would have fallen in love with his reflection. Then there was Ameinias  who was rejected by Narcissus, and killed himself then cursed him, and there was Nemesis who led him to the pool which resulted in him falling in love with his reflection.

I probably felt so strongly towards Narcissus because his story just broke my heart. I didn't even know the full story yet, I only knew he was a guy, who fell in love with his reflection, and died of a broken heart. If that isn't heartbreaking I have no idea what is.

I read a long and winding article about what the story of Narcissus was really supposed to teach you. It was 

long, and once again, confusing. But what I took note of was that 'he didn't scorn others because he was in love with himself', he scorned others, THEN he fell in love with himself.' He scorned those who love him because it all came too easily to him, and in the end he fell in love with the one person he couldn't have. In my opinion that is what happens a lot to real people in real life so I find it interesting. We always, always, want what we can't have. Especially if we have never learnt to appreciate what we actually have. Then there is also the fact that the 'secret point' to this story isn't about him, but the pool. How when you see into a pool, the pool looks back at you. And how it's not you looking at your reflection, but it is your reflection looking back at you. I take it as don't just look at your reflection, but look at how your reflection portrays you. 

'

But in the end, a story is a story, and a story is whatever you want it to be. In my opinion, if you exclude the whole certain death thing, maybe it is trying to tell you that if you have never known yourself, you will never learn to love others. And once you finally discovered yourself, that is when you would love yourself. But be careful, because sometimes, it might be too late.                  

Side note: thank you to the guy who ignited this whole Greek thing. And you know, it's still Ms. Chancello who gave you the card, not me (unless you were referring to her then I apologize xp) But I think I will tell her your thoughts on the card, just to ease her mind a bit :) And hey, I bet you could attract a few stray birds yourself if you were in a Disney film (although with the way we are singing everywhere we go I am starting to think we ARE becoming Disney characters). Hmm, if you (I) could be a character, who would you be.... hmmmmmh...And also, now that you mentioned it, I WOULD like a talking horse to appear, prince or no prince. And in fact, maybe even a talking dragon or something. 

Yeah, if I could, just for a bit, I would run away somewhere too, somewhere Far, Far Away...

Every sky was your own kind of blue

You showed me something that I couldn't see

Opened my eyes and you made me believe

Have a happy day everyone,

Lexie